My day usually starts about 3:30 am. The first order of the day is to get the coffee started, run the dogs outside and get myself awake and functioning. Why? So I can call my sister at least by 4:30 am, wake her up for ‘Our Time’ together. We will usually talk until about 5:30 because she needs to start concentrating on getting my niece up, functioning and ready for school. Wednesdays and Fridays I take off for work at 5:30, on the other days I grab my smokes (for now), a cup of coffee and head into my computer room that is in reality just a little corner in the junk room right now.
Then, like a lot of people I know, I start my day with the news. Only I do it through my computer rather than home delivery in print. That’s mainly because it’s so much easier to read (because I can make the print bigger) and I’m not taking over the kitchen table with newspaper and turning on a light that would be disruptive to others in the house. I have a number of e-subscriptions to various local and national newspapers, my choice of local TV news broadcasts as well as specific newsletters.
The ‘News’ for me then extends to the automatic signing onto Facebook to see what’s happening with family, friends, various ‘Causes’ and to check out what (if anything) was going on with the local business’ I have also subscribed to through Facebook. I’m not really sure what the actual affect is on the grand scale (if there is one) the ‘Like’ button has; however I continue to click it regarding local business and places in an effort to show my support.
Over the last six or so months I’ve spent a great deal of time reading, learning and asking questions through the ‘Help’ section of Facebook in an attempt to understand the ‘ins and outs’ of how to use Facebook safely, productively and effectively. The proper balance of knowledge, common sense and respect for others are the key elements for an enjoyable and fun experience on Facebook, as it is in most everything else both on and off the web.
As both an amateur genealogist and the current coordinator for the Missing Classmates section of my High School Alumni web site, Facebook has been the most effective and powerful single tool in my technological toolbox. I started out with MySpace like a lot of other folks, however the ‘usefulness’ for my purposes skyrocketed with the introduction of Facebook.
Number one is always my family. I have enjoyed being able to share special moments with my family that would have otherwise been missed because of the fact that some of them live half way across the country. Economic times being what they are, large family gatherings just don’t happen the way they used to in times gone by. The ability to ‘talk’ about what’s happening in our lives ‘at the moment’ and to share pictures all in a group setting is priceless to me.
In the ‘once upon a time’ when we would all be able to get together more often, we could somewhat watch the children growing up. This is important to me because of the amount of time I have personally spent away from my family and my hometown. All the years spent away from everyone due to military service, I can honestly relate to the concept of “I can’t believe how big you’ve gotten!” Sometimes when certain events and life’s decisions take us far away, we tend to leave with what I call ‘snapshot memories’ of the people we leave behind. We come home to those we remember as little children only to discover that they’ve grown and become adults, with lives and often children of their own. So many of life’s precious moments are missed out on and lost forever.
Regarding genealogy, I think the biggest ‘treasure’ (currently because I know more will come) that I’ve discovered so far simply through the use of Facebook was the discovery of the fact that Mannington, West Virginia has it’s own Facebook page. That was a milestone in my search for further information about my grandparents on my Dad’s side of the family. I had searched for it because I was aware of the fact that my Grandfather had lived there as a young man. Through that discovery, I was introduced to the town ‘Historian’, a women who provided me with a web site where I was able to obtain an actual copy of my grandparents’ marriage license! This is an exciting thing in the fascinating world of genealogy!
Additionally, I had been a member of the official web site for my high school for quite some time before I decided to just go for it and volunteer to be the coordinator for the Class of 77’s Missing Classmates section. I have to admit that volunteering for that brought about the beginning of a lot of ‘learning’ on how to use Facebook. There were a lot of reasons, mainly because it had been over 30 years since I had graduated high school and I knew that there would probably be a lot of folks that would not remember me. Mostly because when I created my Facebook page I did not use or add my maiden name. Not to mention the fact that I was admittedly pretty timid about contacting some of my old classmates because I did not know that I did not have to send a friend request just to be able to communicate with them.
Once I really paid attention to all that fine print there on Facebook (and reluctantly began using my detested spectacles), I discovered that I could send a ‘message’ to someone that was not listed as my friend on Facebook. Wow, for me that was the best (and most valued) piece of information I could have discovered for this purpose. It wasn’t because there was anyone I would not have wanted as a friend on Facebook, it was more out of respect for those who might not want to be my friend. Because to me, even if you know someone, arbitrarily sending out friend requests seems more than just a bit pushy if not down right rude in some cases. And like I said, it had been 30 years and it wasn’t like I was really all that well known or even liked way back then anyway.
There are a number of my classmates that I have actually sent ‘Friend Requests’ to because we were either friends back in school or because I sincerely would like to be friends with them now. Personally I think most of the people in my graduating class were pretty cool and I basically liked almost everyone and I think in the overall we had a pretty good bunch of folks in my class.
Regardless, I’ve actually been having a lot of fun with that as well as with the genealogy and have seen positive advancements in both areas. On the subject of the Missing Classmates endeavor, I’ve created what I call my permanent ‘Official Invitation’ that is initially sent out to anyone I ‘discover’ through Facebook, using ‘cut and paste’ everyone gets the exact same invite. In an attempt to do my part in trying to make sure it did not appear as though I was harassing anyone, I’ve made a list of those that I’ve already sent an invitation and the date. Right, wrong or indifferent, I feel that resending that invitation on an annual basis should not be considered harassment. However, if someone should contact me and tell me that are just not interested in joining the site, I won't send the invitation anymore. I won't take it personal, as it's nothing but thing. All of this is based on my personal interpretation of showing respect for the privacy of others as well as conducting myself in a ‘friendly’ manner toward everyone on Facebook.
Presently I don’t see myself not having a Facebook page for all the reasons listed above. It is also for all these reasons that I wish Facebook had come to exist all those years ago when I was overseas. I often think about how wonderful it would have been to share the world as I saw it with all my family and friends. It is my sincere hope that this avenue of communication stays open to all of us for a very long time. I fully accept the fact that nothing is permanent or foolproof especially in the world of technology, however I have to admit that I have nearly completely migrated to the use of Facebook.
I do have individuals on Facebook with whom I communicate back and forth now through the Facebook messages because it would not be considered 'appropriate' in my personal book of ethics to list them as a Friend on Facebook. These people are for the most part individuals who have already demonstrated that they do not have the ability to control themselves or to 'move on' regarding a specific topic or past event. I simply choose not to place myself or any of my family or friends in a position where they might be confronted by these individuals. I treat my Facebook page much like my house, if I would not invite you to my house, I won't invite you to my Facebook, just as if I were to ask you to leave my house, I would also unfriend that person on Facebook.
There are still certain people I choose to communicate with through regular AOL emails. My newsletters, organizations and anything official where I feel that there may be a future need to have a reference copy of that communication. Beyond that it has become my preference to pretty much use Facebook. Why? Because at present I have discovered that it provides a better means of interaction in a group setting for one, and it becomes more like an interactive discussion. I also find it much easier to control with whom I actually communicate in the first place, resulting in (currently) less Spam in my inbox. Additional advantages of Facebook are the same as the ‘old plain’ email in that we are not governed by time and distance, we can post things when it is convenient for us unlike trying to pick up the phone and call someone at midnight, 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning.
I also consider myself one of the fortunate ones to be able to watch my friends list grow with meaningful friends and relationships. I say that basically for two reasons, one being I made the decision when I first created my Facebook page (just like I did with MySpace) that I only wanted it for the primary purpose of communicating with family and friends. It is simply my personal choice not to participate in the popular games played on Facebook, not that I do not agree that they have their place and can be a lot fun, it is just not my personal choice. While I’m human (laughs) and I enjoy playing games on my computer, I have a specific web site where I go to play because I actually prefer a different kind of game (mostly card games or word games) that I like to play.
Something else that is not considered by a lot of people is that the Internet, particularly social sites like Facebook and MySpace are valuable resources for many things to individuals in my position. My personal interests of genealogy and the high school thing aside, my physical limitations due to situations beyond my control in the past are progressively becoming permanent disabilities and I have to accept that as a fact of life.
I hope that if there is anyone who takes the time to actually read this also takes the time to do his or her own ‘self-education’ regarding the effective and proper use of Facebook. I hope that everyone continues to enjoy Facebook safely and with respect toward others in both areas, meaning to have respect for the individual as well as for the privacy of that individual.
Thanks for ‘listening’!
No comments:
Post a Comment